Heute bin ich ein bisschen Krank aber ich bin so Glücklich trotz alledem...Ich habe etwas herausgefunden! Ich bin nur ein Jahr alter als bevor aber es war ein chaotische Jahr...Ich habe viele Getränke getrunken, mit vielen Menschen getroffen, und ich bin nach Europa und zurück geflogen. Ich hatte in einem Jahr von Herzschmerz, Glück, Angst und so weiter gefühlt. Es war voll von Erlebnisse, die mich unterrichtet, um Leben besser zu verstehen. Was ist es, das ich herausgefunden habe?
Wahrheit ist wirklich die besten Ding von der ganzen Welt.
Das ist mein Motto für diese nächsten Jahre.
Ich bin noch nicht Bereit, vor die echte Welt zu stehen, aber ich bin sicher, dass Wahrheit die Vorgehensweise ist.
Aus.
Patti
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Friday, January 13, 2012
Whoah! Long time no see..
Hey peeps! I'm back! It's a Friday night and I don't care, it's gon' get crazy up in here!
Actually..I'm at work, on a Friday night. I need money, ok?!?!?
Updating: 2012 started out with promise and hope and cats and all that goodness. I didn't make a resolution but I did get my first new year's kiss by a lovely, wonderful friend named Anna. Friend is the keyword here. I've finally decided that dating is not my forte. Girls are just...well, fuck...girls are just great! But music is and will forever be my heart and soul. If and when dating fits into that I will try and welcome whatever disasters may ensue with open arms, heart, and mind. But until then I've got priorities, man!
Not to say I won't keep my peripherals peeled for possible potentials but I think the bench is the right place for my love life right now. I mean..cause there happens to be several intriguing and sexually attractive females about 2 degrees away from myself....not that I'm noticing or anything.
....droooooooool.
ER!
Anyways, life has been hectic and wonderful the past few months and I feel like I should try and do it some justice here.
I was accepted for a teaching internship through the university German department and this term I'll be studying pedagogy and things to prepare me for teaching elementary students next term. I'm currently shitting my pants.
I spent winter break in Virginia with my fasha doing Christmasy things and playing with cats, which was quite awesome. Tip: don't try and teach old, male, navy retirees about transgenderism at a bar. It will end in severe disappointment and frustration on your side and pure, drunken amusement on theirs.
I'm currently trying my hand at an Au Pair website! Germany and/or Austria this summer would be fantastic and hey, if I made a little money and was able to practice German while living in a German home that would be even more awesome. Wish me luck!
In all this craziness I guess I'm just learning that being myself and doing things that make ME happy are what's, in the long run, going to make my life awesome. If someone wants to hop aboard this train they have to realize that it's only stop is my own happiness. I'm tired of making excuses for dating the people I date. (for example: She is just busy, that's why she hasn't come around in a week. Or: She just cares, that's why she allows me to stomp all over her.) In reality, those people were not the people I wanted to be with because I projected an image of myself that actually wasn't who I was. I also attracted people at the level in which I projected my own self-worth.
Tip: ALWAYS project yourself as being awesome, because you are. Don't settle for someone because it's easy to be around them or because they follow you around like a puppy. The reason why love is so awesome is because of the nervousness and the anxiety and the whole package of dizziness and uncertainty. If they don't make you nervous it's not worth it. If it's not a challenge, don't accept the mediocre because it's easier.
I'm not saying the people I've dated in the past were mediocre, but the relationships I had with them weren't totally awesome because I wasn't being honest about who I am and what I wanted...which made them mediocre. When you find someone that makes you feel like you could touch Uranus with your love and lights fireworks in your underpants, that is when it's worth it. Until then I'm going to stay the course and live my life exactly how I want it and do the things necessary to get me where I want to be because, in the end, all you have is yourself and, in the words of Ru Paul, "If you don't love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?"
OUT.
Actually..I'm at work, on a Friday night. I need money, ok?!?!?
Updating: 2012 started out with promise and hope and cats and all that goodness. I didn't make a resolution but I did get my first new year's kiss by a lovely, wonderful friend named Anna. Friend is the keyword here. I've finally decided that dating is not my forte. Girls are just...well, fuck...girls are just great! But music is and will forever be my heart and soul. If and when dating fits into that I will try and welcome whatever disasters may ensue with open arms, heart, and mind. But until then I've got priorities, man!
Not to say I won't keep my peripherals peeled for possible potentials but I think the bench is the right place for my love life right now. I mean..cause there happens to be several intriguing and sexually attractive females about 2 degrees away from myself....not that I'm noticing or anything.
....droooooooool.
ER!
Anyways, life has been hectic and wonderful the past few months and I feel like I should try and do it some justice here.
I was accepted for a teaching internship through the university German department and this term I'll be studying pedagogy and things to prepare me for teaching elementary students next term. I'm currently shitting my pants.
I spent winter break in Virginia with my fasha doing Christmasy things and playing with cats, which was quite awesome. Tip: don't try and teach old, male, navy retirees about transgenderism at a bar. It will end in severe disappointment and frustration on your side and pure, drunken amusement on theirs.
I'm currently trying my hand at an Au Pair website! Germany and/or Austria this summer would be fantastic and hey, if I made a little money and was able to practice German while living in a German home that would be even more awesome. Wish me luck!
In all this craziness I guess I'm just learning that being myself and doing things that make ME happy are what's, in the long run, going to make my life awesome. If someone wants to hop aboard this train they have to realize that it's only stop is my own happiness. I'm tired of making excuses for dating the people I date. (for example: She is just busy, that's why she hasn't come around in a week. Or: She just cares, that's why she allows me to stomp all over her.) In reality, those people were not the people I wanted to be with because I projected an image of myself that actually wasn't who I was. I also attracted people at the level in which I projected my own self-worth.
Tip: ALWAYS project yourself as being awesome, because you are. Don't settle for someone because it's easy to be around them or because they follow you around like a puppy. The reason why love is so awesome is because of the nervousness and the anxiety and the whole package of dizziness and uncertainty. If they don't make you nervous it's not worth it. If it's not a challenge, don't accept the mediocre because it's easier.
I'm not saying the people I've dated in the past were mediocre, but the relationships I had with them weren't totally awesome because I wasn't being honest about who I am and what I wanted...which made them mediocre. When you find someone that makes you feel like you could touch Uranus with your love and lights fireworks in your underpants, that is when it's worth it. Until then I'm going to stay the course and live my life exactly how I want it and do the things necessary to get me where I want to be because, in the end, all you have is yourself and, in the words of Ru Paul, "If you don't love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?"
OUT.
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